Going out with a coworker from the office can seem like a very romantic prank. Until the romance ends and a breakup occurs that neither of them knows how to deal with, since they have to see each other daily.
Remember all those times your friends and family warned you that dating an office or classmate was a bad idea? Okay. Well they were right. Especially if that someone in the office was your superior or boss, or if that someone in the same class was the teacher.
Dealing with the pain of a breakup itself is difficult. But also having to see that person frequently makes it even worse.
Falling in love with someone we see every day is easy precisely because of the same coexistence. Going out with that person seems like a great idea until it’s over. Now they are forced to treat themselves frequently and have to pretend nothing is wrong.
Since physical distance is not possible, it is necessary to create emotional distance. To achieve this, follow these eight tips to the letter:
Steps to get over someone you have to see every day
When you are at home or in the comfort of your close circle, you usually feel comfortable. It helps that the memory of your ex is something you can keep at bay outside your four walls.
Pedro, when you have no alternative and you must spend at least a couple of hours every day near that person, what can you do to overcome it?
Seeing your ex every day is going to alter your grieving process in one way or another. Whether it’s difficult for you to leave anger and resentment behind because that person is reminding you every day.
Or because you can’t let go of the good memories and you end up clinging to them. It can even be a rather bipolar combination of in love and hate, like a roller coaster that doesn’t let you focus on your activities and your lifestyle.
It is a fact that seeing your ex so often is not healthy. But sometimes there is no other option. To maintain mental health, try to:
1.- Go through the grieving process privately
There are several facets of grief that one goes through after a breakup. And while several of them show up wanting to throw a hot cup of coffee in your ex’s face in full view, that’s not the way to go through them.
It’s natural for you to experience a lot of negative feelings in the grieving process and take various emotional tours of everything that went wrong.
2.- Prepare for the worst
This may sound a bit cynical, but imagine the worst case scenario between you and your ex and be ready for it to happen.
That is to say, things will not be hunky-dory, if the matter is going to get tense, it is best that you already arrive with an emergency plan to get out well. The scenarios that you have to avoid, for your mental well-being and that of your co-workers, are the following:
– You end up alone with your ex in an elevator
– You get into an obvious fight with your ex
– You star in passionate outbursts with your ex in the cleaning closet
– You cry for your ex in the middle of a meeting
– You and your ex end up insulting each other all the time
– Your ex starts dating another coworker
– Your ex avoids you at all costs
3.- Keep it professional
You don’t want to be the typical person from romantic movies who has a jealous rage at the office and ends up starring in a scene, or getting in the way of her or others’ work based on her personal life.
4.- Do not force people to choose a side
To choose sides are friends. Not the co-workers, who, like it or not, care little if so-and-so are done. They just want to continue doing their activities in peace.
Besides, you’re not in high school anymore. Avoid generating gossip of any kind or biasing anyone against your ex.
5.- Do not try to be too nice
This also looks very forced and fake. If you’re being super nice to your ex just to avoid embarrassment, to pretend nothing happened, or to show your ex that you’re okay.
Chances are, you’ll just create more discomfort and it’ll be clear that you’re still not quite over it. Treat him like any other coworker, simple as that.
6.- Find something to do after work
Most people spend a large part of their time daily at work. This is a big problem when you’re forced to spend all that time within fifty feet of someone you’d rather never see again in your life.
That’s why it’s a good idea to find some activity that helps you relax and distract yourself after work.
It may sound a bit extreme, but sometimes when things get really tense, it doesn’t hurt to start looking for other opportunities to grow personally and professionally.
8.- Do not do it again
Most romantic breakups create hurt, confusion, anger, discomfort, and a very strong tendency to overanalyze everything. This pain can be potentiated when you have to see that person every day.
The lesson of a first break of this type should be enough to understand that it is not a good idea to try it again, neither with the same person nor with any other person who is in our daily environment.
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